Tuesday, October 30, 2012

31 Days of Lovely [Day 1: The Meaning of Lovely]


Lovely-  adj. “exquisitely beautiful.” 

Beauty: a word that can flood our minds with pictures in seconds. What do you see as you read the word beauty? Maybe you see someone you know, maybe you see a celebrity you adore, or maybe you see nature. You probably see something different from me, and different from anyone else. That’s the thing about beauty-it has so many definitions. Beauty is diverse. Beauty is mysterious. And each individual defines beauty differently. 

Unfortunately, in our society beauty is a very narrow, unattainable set of physical characteristics. Straight, glowing smile. Long, luscious hair. Thin, toned arms. I could go on and on. Oh, how beauty plagues our minds! We all crave beauty-to the point of worshipping it.  Everywhere we go we are bombarded with images of what the world says beauty is. I personally can’t even flip through a magazine without feeling bad about myself a few pages in. If I’m being completely honest with you and myself, I would say that there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t compare myself to someone else.  The pressure you and I feel to be unrealistically beautiful is real, and often times turns us against ourselves. 

Instead of loving our uniquely-designed, well-functioning, God-given bodies, we stand in the mirror and pinch that extra bit of fat. We stand on scales with fingers crossed. We dream and hope for changes that are impossible (by natural means, anyway.) The worst part is that we punish our bodies for being what they are. We say, “You’re running an extra mile tomorrow morning for that donut you just had!” I don’t know about you, but I would never say that to any of my girlfriends. So why do we say it to ourselves? Why are we so quick to treat our bodies like they are in boot camp? 

Sadly, we are unable to see our own unique and radiant beauty. We are blinded by society’s half-way version of it. You see, your beauty is not built outside-in. It must be developed inwardly. True, tangible, captivating, exquisite beauty flows from the inside out. 

I like to use the word lovely. People don’t usually use lovely, but I do. I feel that it is not tainted by the inaccurate definitions of the media. People can tell you how beautiful you look until the cows come home, and you may never get it. But when someone looks at you and says, “You are lovely,” there’s something different about that. Older people get me, I guess. I adore when gracefully aged women tell me I’m lovely. It sounds conceited, but it comes from a heart that is just tired of constantly reaching and fighting for counterfeit beauty. So when I hear the words, “You are lovely,” I also hear “You are a lovely soul. You are a lovely mind.” For once, my appearance is not being examined or reviewed, and I can rest in that brief moment.

And brief it is. Not even hours later I am back to sizing myself up and obsessing over myself. Truthfully, when we are constantly doing this we are walking in selfishness and vanity. In my opinion, a truly lovely woman does not spend hours thinking about herself. She is selfless and the thought of how she can help others is on her mind. 


Mother Teresa comes to mind as I contemplate of true loveliness. At a young age, Teresa felt the call of God on her life and dedicated herself to missions. At only 18 years old she left her home and joined the Sisters of Loreto, a community of nuns ministering in India. She worked in a Catholic school in Calcutta, but each and every day she saw those suffering from poverty and hunger outside of her convent walls. In 1948 Mother Teresa received permission from the convent to live among the poorest of the poor in the slums of Calcutta. She devoted herself to serving those that society had decided were unworthy of love. Mother Teresa, though she had no money or resources unless given to her by Divine Providence,  started "The Missionaries of Charity," which continues to minister to those in poverty all over the world today. As a result of her missionary work, Mother Teresa received the Pope John XXIII Peace Prize (1971) and the Nehru Prize for her promotion of international peace and understanding (1972). She also received the Balzan Prize (1979) and the Templeton and Magsaysay awards.

This is how she described loveliness: "Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile."

I don’t mean to sound cliche, but hear me when I say this: You are lovely. You were made perfectly. You are somebody’s joy and love, and you are more than a body. 

My heart is for you to discover your true loveliness. In order to do this, we must redefine beauty. As mentioned before, beauty is not outward. It emanates from the soul, and it is composed of characteristics. In my (current) struggle with self-worth and insecurity, the Lord gave me a list of things He sees as beautiful, as lovely. And He lead me to write about each one individually. Conveniently, there are 30 of them. I’m telling you, I did not make these up. There is no way I could have sat there and chosen 30 characteristics myself. I feel so strongly that God laid each and every one on my heart.

I pray that as you read these, You will redefine beauty. I pray that this would be a journey for you, and for me. By no means am I writing this because I have overcome my insecurities. Instead, Jesus is gently humbling my soul as He so often does and nudging me to be transformed by the renewal of my mind as Paul so eloquently encouraged us to do (Romans 12:2).

I’m so tired of trying to be beautiful for this world and for people. I want to be beautiful in the eyes of the only Man who can truly love me, even the hidden, dark, depths of me. Let’s learn to be lovely women together. There is nothing more lovely than a woman who knows she is a precious gem in Christ's eyes. A woman truly flourishes in that knowledge.

-Sammie



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